Tag Archives: music

You Are An Original: Self Love & Belief

I’m having one of those weeks where I feel like if I could just take a little bit of time, sit down and write, I’d feel so much better. Problem is, when I sit down to write, I just can’t seem to translate my thoughts down to text. This week has been a challenging one, in that I’ve been a little more clear-headed and able to see things from a bit of a fresh perspective but at the same time, I feel my stubborn side trying to fight against it. Sometimes being a Gemini can be a pain. Feeling very very split on some things lately and I know at some point I’m going to have to make a decision and commit to whatever it is I decide. Can I just go back to being a carefree kiddo? I think I wish that once a week AT LEAST.

So among the battles of this week, I’m in this process of learning to stop avoiding confrontation. I know it SUCKS to put your foot down, stand up for yourself and demand answers regardless of what reaction you get but at some point it has to be done. I’m the type of person that will quickly end any conflict by just nodding in agreement to move on as quick as possible. I’m usually the first to apologize and take the blame (even when neither action is necessary).

Royal Tailor // Original

I’ve come a long way and a lot of that is because of the confidence I’ve gained from losing weight. I guess, in essence, I place more value on myself now. However, more often than I care to admit, I still struggle. I struggle with self-confidence, self-esteem and self-belief. I’m sure a lot of it boils down to fears (usually silly, irrational fears) but also I have that annoying desire that we all seem to have deep down.. and that is: to be accepted.

Why do we place value on ourselves based on what the people in our lives think about us? Even those closest to us that we love the most are going to let us down from time to time. And those same people, are probably the ones most likely to hurt us, too. Maybe it’s just a simple offhand comment they make without thinking and somehow that one comment plants this giant seed of negativity in our hearts that is constantly feeding us NEGATIVE lies! ‘You’re fat.’ ‘You’re stupid.’ ‘You’re ugly.’ ‘You’re weak.’ ‘You’ll never succeed.’ ‘You’re incapable.’ ‘You’re not enough.’ etc. WHY?! Why do we torture ourselves with these thoughts? Why do we believe them? Why do we let others make us feel this way? I hate it!!

I guess we can choose to remove those kind of people from our lives, but sometimes that’s just not possible and sometimes it doesn’t even have to come from another person. It’s all around us. It’s on TV, on the newsstands, on the internet. It’s everywhere. So in a world full of negativity what can we even do to fight it?

It’s a non-stop battle but for starters we can place our value on what God thinks about us. I always have to remind myself of this and anytime a negative thought pops up, I try to immediately SLAY that thought by turning it into a thought that God would think instead. I saw this posted on Facebook this week and it was absolutely what I needed in that moment:

Beyond that, I’ve also been listening to Royal Tailor‘s new album almost non-stop lately and I feel like my personal anthem of the moment is the song “Original.” Check it out!

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

I’m original, so original,
I’m original, the original

Tell me, why I feel like I must keep up
Reaching for what I just can’t touch
No I never can get enough
Tell me, why I’m hustlin’ everyday
Spending time like its currency
Paying bills but I can’t buy change
Pressure all around me
Is this who I’m supposed to be
Sick and tired of fittin’ the mold
Dysfunction is the cycle
That’s makin me a psycho
And I don’t have to take it no more

So overrated, too fabricated for me
So close to jaded
but I still choose to believe
I’ve been created for something greater
I’m a fighter, igniter, yeah I’m the original

Tell me, why we’re struggling everyday
Try to hide behind things we say
While we lose our identity
Tell me, if we choose to be who we are
Don’t pretend to be what we’re not
Show the world what’s inside your heart
Pressure all around me
Is this who I’m supposed to be
Sick and tired of fittin’ the mold
Dysfunction is the cycle
That’s makin me a psycho
And I don’t have to take it no more

It’s amazing the kind of motivation, inspiration and strength you discover when someone underestimates you and your abilities and you instead realize that you are capable, strong and beautiful in GOD’S eyes and that nothing else really matters!

Also a side note, site related: I was nominated for the Sunshine Award by a couple friends! I’ve been working on that post for over a week now and it should be up soon as well as an October Recap! Keep an eye out for those soon!